What if a person can vomit him or herself when going through difficult times? or vomiting when he feels disgusted by something.
will it possible be a relief?,will it be a black dust as we see in horror films?, Or will it be a gel or mucus?, and what color will it be the color?; Black or blue or gray?.
I imagine that someone was able to vomit his/her self. Then do we call what comes out the hollow man?,
Is he going to be alive or dead?, And how will the face look like?;
So .. In the process of vomiting, one gets rid of human concerns, from the illusions in his life.
How attractive and frightening this idea, ... but ... wait a moment!! ; What drove me to the this level of thinking?,
And how could my imiagination drag me to imagine my body without the a soul,
all i can still remeber is that i am siting on acatche in the house of an old Victorian in the (West Hempstead)
with an old blonde woman who does not like me.all what gets to talk to her is the rent that I pay her for my room.
you are back to be absent-minded again , O miserable!!;
this how the old woman cut off the old "dark" thoughts in my mind, then added: I see you're living in your imagination more than reality.
This could be a big problem , you need to get rid of it quickly, otherwise I you are going crazy soon.
I Respond, saying: Insanity is the last thing in the list of my fears,
but sometimes I do I need to unload large shipments of pent-up energy.
Crazy people are lucky becuase they act without concerning about people's reaction.
she Says: You wish to become insane? ... Hah
I shall answer: I just hope I get some privileges that the crazy crazy people have!!
privileges?!!!
I say: Yes .. privileges. Insane person is not interested in the opinion of the people,
and they do not pay attention to their reactions. he/she does not think of anything, and this in itself is a huge achievement!!.
The equation is simple, from my point of view; you either to overcome your fear and illusions and become wise;
or that you become crazy. It is also privileges becuase they have nothing to fear from it, or afraid of it.
and whichever you choose: to be wise or be mad?
I shall answer: It's not a choice; It is a faith! .I decide to hide behind this word because
I think that hard choices need to be something the size of fate to separate them.
the old woman did not say anything, but looked at me with combination of surprise , pity and resentment!!.
Maybe now she is saying to herself, From which mine of cole this miserable object came from?.
Faith is this huge horrible word. We deal with faith as it is something inevitable and it is our duty to obey, without protesting or arguing;
